being an all-rounder..

..it  BLOWS. 

for the past few days i've been doing stacks and stacks of question papers. and every, single, time i score about 33 out of 40 for all my subjects. now don't get me wrong, that's a pretty decent score. however, when you've read your textbook(including the parts that aren't so important) twice, studied your notes about four times for each subject, did more than frigging SIXTY papers only in the past month.. and when you're able to regurgitate every, single, fact from your notes/textbook.. 33 out of 40 is pretty pathetic.

it stinks, knowing that that is your limit. knowing that you're putting in ALL the effort you possibly can, and not being able to transcend it. why? because you are a mere all-rounder, condemned to an average life.

i should be achieving greatness, with all the effort i am investing into this meaningless exam. but no, all i'll ever be is "good". wanna be brilliant? that's impossible.

i want to achieve greatness not for any sort of glory, but only because it is fair.



i wish i was intelligent.

no. i wish that i was just brilliant at something, anything. i don't have to be smart if i'm a natural at dolphin training, drawing, singing, sports, fishing, whatever.


i'm so done. i will go and sleep my frustration off now, and resume my life of painful mediocrity tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, until the day i die.

i better be the best harp player in heaven or something.